Taken entirely out of context, mind you.
"Je viens de voir louis garrel à vélo!"
[-Judith. umm... hott.]
"If it is him pat says you should hit that."
[no explanation wanted or required.]
"OMG. I just bought breaking dawn. I just couldn't resist. I used my us credit card which happens to still have some money on it. A miracle!"
[-Judith]
"Thanks! Hope your trip is smashing as well. I also hope we are good enough friends that you wont stop being my friend despite me using the word smashing..."
[-Laura as she left for Morocco]
"wheneva! im scraping vomit right now"
[-Pat.]
"Is anyone up for a coffee? Chai? Macaron? Wine? Beer? Coke? Crack? Crystal meth? Blow? Glint? Hashish? Playboy? Pickle? Doorknob? Elevator? Vacuum? Antenna?"
[-Randall, pre-Chai outing.]
"Aside from locating and pinching randys bottom, my debts to you are fulfilled. Awkwardest day ever."
[-Laura, after fulfilling circumstances of failed bet.]
"Dude - seriously drunk. Alex and i walked to the park near his place and finished a bottle of champagne. Oy..."
[-surprise from Eva]
"Salut c est pierre de l ecole. Si tu veux passer rappelle moi. Ciao."
[-the beginning of something strange]
"did he roofie u? can u call out tom? how many laws did you guys break? dont forget to drink water!"
[-Pat, post rendez-vous with 'pierre de l ecole.']
"Slut it up lil lady - one of us has to score ce soir"
[-Randall - neither of us did]
"heyyyy cest mimi hamburger, come play!"
[-Pat upon arrival chez moi.]
"La fete est chez moi a partir de 21h. I don t know what obnoxious means. Bye."
"Knock em dead anyer"
[-Randall being encouraging]
"Haha i am worried about it alot. i just peed myself hardcore. im scared to look you people in the eye."
"Wowowow... At everything! Please take notes - i will require the story upon my return. Wish you guys were here! A big hug and a kiss with aids on top."
[-Randall expressing affection]
"Dont do it!! Pat will be back soon, right? Train from Paris. No bocadillo yet, but i saw a beluga whale get its period. Enchanting. Valencia is really nice - hot!"
[-Randall.]
"Je vais manger chez mes parents mais ca aurait ete avec plaisir."
[-P-O out-frenching the situation.]
"hey! just waking up - rough night of drinking w my mom. sadly i have to play tour guide this afternoon argh! maybe later?"
[-Pat, 11.37 am.]
"If portugal had a child with victoire, she would be marseille."
[-Laura upon arrival à Marseille]
"I am drunk too text?"
[-Laura. Priceless.]
"Give tweedle a snuggle and send maryse none of my love"
[-Laura from CDG]
"Boarding now. toy phone is getting switched off :( i'll text you from my shiny new track phone bientot. I love you mucho!"
[-Laura boards. My heart breaks.]
"A mistake ? No, nevermind. No problem. Anyway, i got lot of things to do today, can t go out this afternoon. See you tomorrow."
[-Best use of "nevermind" I've ever encountered.]
"Hi. I m glad that you like vampire we. I m glad i can make you american girl discover an american band ;)"
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